Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Letting Go

wishing on the stars
being alone
leaving my phone
losing my watch
letting me breathe
taking a walk
getting lost
being self-sufficient
letting my hair down
losing control
taking a break
relaxing for a while
resetting my clock
cutting my ties
giving up responsibility
chilling out
laughing it off
giving everything back
saving up the hope
slowing down
watching the world
exploring my world
connecting to something
closing in on serenity
inventing myself

Monday, April 26, 2010

In The Music

I went to the most beautiful concert last night. Everything about it was perfect. The people, the songs, the performance. By the end of the night, I was in the music. Living, breathing, loving. My soul was on stage, my body was dancing, my mouth was singing the words that my heart has known all of this time. I was truly happy. It was the most beautiful way to end the best year of my life.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Some Days

Some things are just easy.
And some days are just good.
Some times are better than others.
And some days I wish I could -
I wish I could get up, go back,
Live my life like today.
I'm not looking for a second chance,
I'm just looking for a new way.
Because yesterday just wasn't -
Wasn't at all what I wanted.
And these ghosts from my past
Just can't keep me haunted.
Because I just fought back.
I stood up and walked out.
I might not know where I'm going,
But I have no room for doubt.
So today I have a new face to show,
A new glow to light my way.
Happiness is new to me
But this is where I'll stay.
Some things are just easy.
Some days are just good.
Some times are better than others.
Hell, I always knew they would.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Perfectly Ordinary

You know those days where everything is the way that it should be? I just had one.

Last night I went with my best friends to a party and we had the time of our lives. Good music, good dancing, good friends, good times. We slept in late this morning and then ate breakfast and got ready. We went to another party in the afternoon with the same good friends from the night before. Then, we went back to our rooms and rested. We grabbed some dinner and played tennis until the lights went out.

Spending the entire day with friends is a good way to celebrate life. It was so ordinary. And that is precisely why it was so perfect.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Me, Myself, and I

I was never one to be alone. I always used to hate going places by myself and doing anything without company. I can now say that I have changed.

I don't know what made me this way. Something happened this semester that has made me so comfortable in my own skin. I have not felt self-conscious in a while and have oozed confidence in every part of my life that I can think of.

Maybe it was my room mate moving out. I had to learn to be comfortable with myself. I literally spend hours every day with just me. I never sleep, so when the rest of the world goes to sleep, I only have myself to stay with. I can thank my room mate for loving me and leaving me. She is such a good friend and I miss her, but at the same time, I really love the new me.

Maybe it was receiving the most truthful insult of my life. I had to come to terms with aspects of my personality that I had never looked at before. My aunt said something to me that she intended to be nice, but it was actually a back-handed compliment. I had to take it in stride. And truth be known, she was right. And I am okay with that.

Maybe it was coming to terms with my future. I realized that my job might not be perfect for me, but it was the responsible thing to do. I became determined to keep with my current path so that I may afford to live a life that is healthy for me.

Maybe it was a lot of things.

Whatever it was, thank you. I love myself. I have never felt that way before.